Monday, January 19, 2009

Another decision... really?

They say the only thing constant in life is change. With every change arises the need for a decision.

This is probably one of those things we do all the time without realization, just like blinking of an eye lid. From what to wear in the morning to choice for dinner, every moment of the day requires some sort of a decision from us. Those of you who are thinking "What are you talking about, I don't think so much. I just pick up the first thing in my cupboard and wear it. For dinner, I go to my regular restaurant and order my regular dish. You are wrong there Missy!!", I would like to tell you - you are wrong. You have taken a decision to follow a pattern, which you once decided upon. I decided upon the title of this post, trying to get an easy way out of taking a decision about the title! (crooked and complex!!)

And yes, not one or two, but all these decisions matter - some seemingly less than the others and some appearing inconsequential. One of the biggest decision facing me right now, I guess, is what be the next career move. Like so many others and unlike so many of you, I enjoy everything I do. Hence a whole lot of confusion ensued. I guess finally I am reaching somewhere, or at least I am hoping I will, after extensive brainstorming for the past few months.

Even with all the options open in front of me, it shouldn't have been that difficult to come to a decision. One way out would have been asking my parents to tell me. This is exactly what I did. But they refused to tell me what to do with my life, which is only fair, but ended up making me more unsure than ever. What made matters worse for me during these past months was that, for sometime, I had stopped listening to myself. I was taking the opinion of every Tom, Dick and Harry and in the process getting more and more confused. Family and friends were influencing me more than my liking. Surprisingly, when you are unsure about what to do, others can very easily influence you. If you lack clarity of thought, others just cloud your thoughts further. It might happen that you end up taking the right decision under the influence, but I believe every individual should be responsible for all her/his decisions - right or wrong. Thus, I had to block out everyone from my mind, parents, friends and surroundings - and think for myself, myself. It might sound dramatic but the truth is that I got a singular vision of what I wanted once I put my heart and my mind together.

The power and influence of a decision is felt especially when your life drifts in the wrong direction. This is more so because you sit and take notice of what went wrong. One wrong move, one wrong statement, one unconsidered comment can land you in trouble.

आग का क्या है? पल भर में लगती है,
बुझते बुझते एक ज़माना लगता है|

This ghazal captures the essence so well. A foolish decision can put you in a mess, and sometimes even after desperate attempts you can't get out of it. Well, its not guaranteed that even after putting in a lot of thought you will always make the right decision. All that you can do is be content with it for now, believe that what you have done will lead only to better things and hope that you haven't made any mistakes. Even if you have, don't look back and blame yourself, just learn from that mistake and, if possible, not do it again. Making mistakes is inevitable. Even Sachin Tendulkar goes back to the pavilion scoring a duck.

Another thing that pertains to decision making is prejudice. As one of my friends pointed out, even small prejudices can influence your decisions. But how do you rid yourself of the prejudices, which are harbored in our minds as important considerations and parameters? These bench marks vary from person to person, and I believe (may be I am prejudiced here!) are vital for human thought and perception. So ridding oneself of prejudices and developing a completely objective viewpoint is possible only in a utopian world. After all, human beings are 'programmed' to view things as 'whole' and not bits and pieces. For those of you who look for scientific angles in everything, a study of Gestalt's cognitive rules might turn out to be interesting.

From my understanding, these prejudices arise out of the experiences one has had in one's surroundings. We all, in various ways, are affected by our environment. Thus, our thinking and solutions, for the same problems, too differ. Likewise what we gauge and gain in understanding from the situation is different. This drastic difference in worldly view makes us take different decision. What I think will be good, might not be the best thing according to you. But that is what makes our individuality, and that is what makes us two different people. If you could understand everything that influences my decisions, or that goes on in my head, we would be at the same pedestal - taking the same decision.

And wouldn't that be just too boring??


Tanaya said...

my gosh!! such a phillosophical post... felt more like a CAT RC passage!! :)
i agree that u and only u can decide whats d best for u coz only u know what ur heart really wants...

KK said...

decisions maketh the man!

btw... :-/

NAL'I'n'I' said...

@tanaya: creation of an idle mind... convoluted thinking is my hobby i guess...
sry if i made to revisit the horrors of CAT...but that gives me and idea... prob i should make some money out of it

@kk: totally! thats why the call for individuality... and ya smile! :)

Tanaya said...

@nallu: lol... sure... go ahead... but dont forget to gimme a share of d money u make frm my idea :P ;) :)

KK said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
KK said...

@ nalini " and ya smile! :) "

umm.. i dont think u got the point!
and i didnt, either.. (as in what u meant by that line)

Danny said...

u shud put too much weight on a particular decision.. if make a wrong choice, its nt d end of d world.. it may jus affect ur life fr a short time.. if its d right choice, u ll never look back n say, "yeah i had made d right choice!"

NAL'I'n'I' said...

@danny: thats what i mean when i say "Even if you have(made a wrong decision), don't look back and blame yourself, just learn from that mistake and, if possible, not do it again"... we all try to do our best at all times...dont we?